Sunday, May 29, 2011

It Goes To 11

If you come in saying you have the worst abdominal pain of your life, and that you thought you wouldn't make the 50 yard walk to the aid station, while laughing, joking, pacing around, hopping onto the exam table, and failing to guard your abdomen, I would have to say you're probably full of shit, and not in the clinical sense.

The fact that you displayed all the characteristics of an attention-seeking fourteen year old girl on speed also does not help inspire confidence in your holding a commission. Thank goodness promotion has more to do with sit-ups, push-ups, the two-mile run, and the ability kiss ass like a porn star as we'd have a serious deficit of field grades.

Sometimes my hands literally tingle out of desire for an axe handle to swing.

1 comment:

K-Dubyah said...

Uhm, can't you prescribe a heavy dose of laxatives to help relieve that load of sh**?

Stay safe out there!