Saturday, March 14, 2009
Behold, And Tremble: For I Am The Destroyer Of Porcelain
Thursday, I replaced the flapper valve in a toilet because it wouldn't stay open more than a second or two. Turning the shut-off valve disrupted the old, rotted seals, so that water was running out around the vavle stem. This led to a small pond in the bathroom and basement, so I had to shut off the entire house's water supply. Squeezing myself into the six inches of space between the toilet and wall, I unscrewed the old valve, managing to slice off a nice piece of skin via the large burr on the back of the valve I hadn't seen. Now there was blood and water all over the floor. Off to the store, where I bought a new valve, and adaptors for the different size threads. Install the new valve, and test the toilet. The new water line valve, perfect. The new flapper valve, sucks as much as the old one. Yesterday, attempt another new flapper valve. Works pretty good, but it's getting pulled out of alignment by the chain. Attempt to adjust alignment by bending the bar linking toilet handle to the flapper chain; break bar in half. Stop for the day before smashing toilet in frustration. Today, go buy new handle and bar. Attempt to remove nut holding handle on, and strip the nut with closest fitting socket wrench. Move to locking pliers,which starts to move nut....and rest of fixture, fracturing toilet tank. Quit before stroking out. Tomorrow, shop for entire new toilet due to crappy $1.99 part. Hope that floor doesn't collapse or new toilet spontaneously explodes during installation.