Thursday, May 21, 2009

I'm Not OCD.....I'm Just Dedicated



After the wife has had to steam-clean an area of our living room at least three times, plus paying a professional service enough money to buy some nice boxes of premium pistol ammo, I had to practice serious restraint not to strangle at least one dog tonight, having been left a steaming gift behind the couch tonight. While I was in the house, and the dog door was open for use. Funny, the dogs didn't have any problem finding the dog door a few seconds after I found that steaming pile of turd.

But, being the benificent tyrant of house canids that I am, I refrained from going out in the yard and converting the one I'm pretty sure did it (how, you may ask, out of three dogs, could I know? A lot of time in the yard with a scoop, that's how) into a some kind of leather product. Instead, I merely converted an old webcam into a dog poop surveillance system behind my couch.

Truly, I am a genius...or a freak, depending if you go by The Wife's expression upon seeing my accomplishment. At least now, through the power of B.F. Skinner's behavioral principles, I'll know which dog to brainwash until I get this:

3 comments:

Bob said...

just put a few unbaited mousetraps (snap trap kind) behind the couch for instant negative reinforcement.

MauserMedic said...

Bob,

Interesting idea; the only concern is one of the smaller dogs getting any broken toes. Maybe if I can weaken the spring a little bit so it's not quite as much impact.....

MauserMedic said...

Anon,

unfortunately, it's the other end that's the concern; so in this case, I guess we would need rectal shock rod. Sadly, I'm guessing I could probably find something like that, although it's probably geared towards people rather than dogs.....