The Saudi Morals Police: Keeping You Safe From Witchcraft Since 1926

RIYADH, 25 March 2007 — The Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and the Prevention of Vice is Saudi Arabia’s morality police. Its members roam the streets day and night looking for offenders of morality from both sexes. They randomly enter malls, restaurants and local and private establishments to enforce proper moral conduct. They also have the power to close shops during prayer times and asking people to attend prayers in mosques. In addition, they enforce the rule of gender segregation in public areas — with the exception of malls and hospitals. They also have the authority of confiscating material which they consider inappropriate to the Kingdom’s moral values. This material includes a wide variety of books and photos, pornographic material, sculptures, etc.

Hmm...shades of Monty Python:

NOBODY expects the SpanishIslamic Inquisition! Our chief weapon is surprise...surprise and fear...fear and surprise.... Our two weapons are fear and surprise...and ruthless efficiency.... Our *three* weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency...and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope Prophet.... Our *four*...no... *Amongst* our weapons.... Amongst our weaponry...are such elements as fear, surprise....

Q: What is the commission doing to catch sorcerers in Saudi cities. And what is their fate after they are caught? Could you tell us how many of them were caught this year and their locations? And what about the magic spells that are thrown into the Red Sea? How are these spells broken?

A: The commission plays a large role in capturing people who practice sorcery or delusions since these are vices which affect the faith of Muslims and cause harm to both nationals and expatriates. The commission has assigned centers in every city and town to be on the lookout for these men. As for their fate, they are arrested and then transferred to concerned authorities. The commission also has a role in breaking magic spells, which are found in the sea. We cooperate with divers in this aspect. After the spells are found, they are then broken using recitations of the Holy Qur’an. We do not use magic to break magic spells, as this is against the teachings of Islam as mentioned by the Supreme Ulema. But we use the Qur’an as did the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him).

Once again, shades of Monty Python.

Direct to you from the cradle of Islam, via Arab News, The Middle East's Leading English Language Daily.

hat tip to Maverick News Media